If Not For The Day
by Loise
Summary: Newly graduated lawyer, Haruhi Fujioka, is unprepared when she is hired by Ouran Law Firm only as a cleaner. AU. Features all of the Host Club.
1. Chapter 1

**If Not for the Day**

* * *

The man smiled as he handed over the mop. "Here. You know your duties? Good," he said though she hadn't answered, "Prepared to be on call every day, at all hours," he held up a hand when she opened her mouth. "I know, but it's in your contract," he sighed. "Twelve months I'll never see again. Hopefully I will never see you again. Oh, and one word of advice, stay away - far away - from the one with the glasses." He stopped, smile becoming more brilliant. "I'm free."

Without another word the man turned and left the offices of the prestigious Ouran Law Firm.

Haruhi stared at the mop in her hand and resisted the urge to sigh. "This will be short term," she murmured to herself as she started mopping the marble floors of the Firm. "This will be instructive," Haruhi added, "It will be a learning experience and will give me a lesson in humility and a grounding in a back up career. There was simply too many people graduating and too few jobs. I'll be sure to get a job next year. A job opening might even come before then."

She paused, gripping the mop with tighter fingers, "I wish there weren't so many rose petals on the ground. How wasteful."

* * *

For the first time in as long as Haruhi could remember she arrived home after her father. He was sitting, traces of make up on his face as he leaned over a cup of still steaming tea. "Haruhi!" He said, "You're home!" He leapt up and embraced her which Haruhi endured for three seconds before pulling away citing suffocation.

"It appears I will be working long hours," Haruhi murmured, rubbing the back of her neck. "But the pay was higher than at the local mini mart."

Her father sighed as she walked stiffly into the kitchen and started making herself some coffee. "Shouldn't you be going to bed?" He asked, playing with the blue cuff of his sleeve.

"I thought I would go over some notes before I go to sleep, I want to keep up to date with legal terminology. It will be useful in the long run," Haruhi said, smiling when she looked up. "There is no need to worry. We both agreed when I wasn't accepted by Fujimoto Law Firm that it would be best for me to get a job and wait until next April."

"That's what you agreed on, Haruhi, I wanted my precious daughter to rest before going into the big world. I have some savings and I've managed to support us both before this," Ryoji insisted.

"I can't depend on you forever," Haruhi said, sipping her coffee. "I have to be practical. It is the proper thing to do."

"You haven't leaned on me enough," her father returned. But didn't protest further when Haruhi left the room, coffee cup still in hand.

Haruhi was very tired, but she read the notes dutifully for over an hour before retreating to her narrow futon. As soon as her head touched her pillow she was asleep, dreaming of more than a thousand sheets of paper falling from the sky, covering her from head to toe.

* * *

"This is our office," said Hikaru, his smile not entirely pleasant. He nodded, waving one hand across the wide office space of the Hitachiin twins.

The office appeared to be separated by a mirror, but as Haruhi had belatedly found out, it merely reflected the twin's taste for identical space and design. Haruhi surveyed the room quietly for purely cleaning purposes, noting with some resignation the huge windows. Then she wondering briefly why the twins felt it necessary to give her this tour.

"Yes, now, to Kyouya's office," Kaoru said, linking arms with Hikaru. "He can be very uptight when all his mess isn't cleaned up," the twins waved their hands around, "Commoner cleaner knowledge," they then said at the same time.

"Hmm," Haruhi said noncommittally, not recalling when this had been part of her duties. Perhaps it was an extra one?

Edging their way carefully to Kyouya's office, the twins barged in when they had listened at the door for several seconds. "Ha! You're still here working, Kyouya," declared Kaoru. "Late, late, late, your sweet sister will be most distressed!"

"Not only sweet," Hikaru insisted, "Pretty!" The twins clasped hands and swooned together. Haruhi noted the room was dark, the blue light of his laptop reflecting off his glasses, hiding his eyes from view. So this was Kyouya Ohtori... had to be the 'one with the glasses'.

"And married," Kyouya said, looking up from the blue glow of his laptop. "And expecting her first child."

Kaoru sighed, "A tragedy for sure that such a delightful woman in lost to the cruel shackles of marriage." His brother nodded.

"We still have each other, Kaoru," Hikaru whispered, reaching out and caressing his brother's shoulder.

"Oh, Hikaru!" They embraced, heads posed to perfect effect.

"What is that she doing here?" Kyouya murmured, gesturing to the silent Haruhi. "The new cleaner should be doing her duties, which do not include your amusement. I will have to dock her pay." Kyouya typed briefly in his laptop, then looked up. "And?" Something in the timbre of his voice made the twins jerk back and close the door hastily behind them.

"He docked my pay," Haruhi said, she narrowed her eyes at the twins. "Hmm," she said briefly before turning and retreating to her mop and broom.

"No, no, no!" Hikaru and Kaoru leapt forward, each grabbing one of her arms. "We haven't completed the tour, yet, you can't return to your duties, commoner."

"Don't you have work to do?" Haruhi questioned. "I do. Lots of it."

They waved their hands about again and Hikaru shrugged, "There's always tomorrow."

"Plus, Kyouya is guarding this case file with his life. He only allows Tamaki to review it, I think Tamaki has it now and only because it's Tamaki's speciality," Kaoru added.

"His speciality? I thought this was a commercial law firm," Haruhi murmured. "What speciality could that be? Property law?"

"Ah, Tamaki is our secret weapon, he lures in other clients," Hikaru answered. "He's like a honey bait. Sticky and sweet."

"I am not sticky! I clean my teeth every day, wear different clothes every day and I am not bait!" Haruhi turned around at the voice stared down at a small blond child. Her gaze was immediately brought up when she regarded the very tall man standing stoically behind the child.

"Honey!" The twins exclaimed together.

"It's true, I'm not bait at all. I'm not, right Mori?" Honey looked up and smiled winsomely at Mori who nodded. "See? Mori knows I'm not bait!"

"What is a child doing here at such late hours?" Haruhi asked. Staring when Honey looked like he was about to burst into tears.

The twins burst into laughter, "That's not a child! Those two are partners, Mitsukuni Haninozuka and Takashi Morinozuka! Honey and Mori," they said between guffaws. Honey pouted.

"Oh," Haruhi said, briefly looking away from Honey. "I didn't know."

"I'm not bait," Honey murmured, "I just like honey. On cookies, cake... mmm. I want cake!"

Still cackling, the twins led her forward leaving Honey and Mori behind, Honey still chatting on the importance of fresh, sweet honey and how it went perfectly with strawberry cupcakes. "Now, to lion's den!" Hikaru declared.

"To meet the infamous Tamaki Suoh once and for all!" Kaoru chimed in. "Don't be scared," he whispered, warm breath blowing against her cheek.

"But don't worry, we won't judge you run and away and cry," Hikaru added, snickering snidely. "Tamaki has a way of making all the ladies - " He stopped, "You'll see."

They smiled together, opening the door with one smooth motion, bowing and gesturing her forward. Haruhi absently adjusted her kerchief covering her hair, it seemed to have gotten loose when the twins had forcibly dragged her where she had been mopping the floor outside the foyer. She didn't notice at first Tamaki, who had stood up when the door had opened.

"Ah? Is this another client? So late? I don't normally deal with male clients but this case must be troublesome," and suddenly Tamaki was by her side, one hand on her elbow, drawing her to a small purple lounge when he sat her down and then joined her. "Is your wife cheating on you?"

"My wife?" Haruhi asked, confused, jerking back when Tamaki stroked her shoulder. "No. I don't, I am a - "

"Of course not! Any woman who cheats on her husband is not worthy of the title of wife, bestowed upon in the springtime of love, cruel lies tearing at hope and affection," Tamaki insisted, one hand on his heart.

"But she doesn't - " Haruhi interrupted, frowning slightly. This man, she thought, was a fool.

"No! No! Don't tell me," Tamaki recoiled, one hand held up to her gaping mouth, "She has... done it more than once! Cheated on such an individual as yourself! The desecration of the marriage vows!" As he moved forward, his blond hair was swept away from his eyes, the vivid purple startling Haruhi.

"I don't have a - " Haruhi tried to break in, noticing for the first time the room was heavy with the scent of roses. Ah, she deducted, Tamaki must be the source of the roses constantly spread across the smooth marble floors of the Ouran Law Firm.

"Oh dear! Oh dear! She and her lover, lovers! Have embezzled your fortune and..." He stared at a moment at Haruhi's attire, "Burned your clothes?" Tamaki shook his head, "The temptress! Leaving you to wear some disgustingly hideous clothes, it is a tragedy!"

Haruhi blinked staring down at her clothes. "I like these clothes," she said quickly. "They're comfortable."

"Such a pity!" Tamaki murmured, holding her hand, staring deeply into her eyes. "She has spun fantasies in your mind, making you delusional. Don't worry, Tamaki will return your sanity!"

"This is ridiculous, I don't - "

"You still wish to return to your treacherous wife?" Tamaki clasped a hand to his heart, head jerking backward, "You are a true lover! Your love spins around you, cocooning you from the hard realities of your wife's behaviour!"

Haruhi stood up, "I really have to leave, I have duties to return to." She thought of the foyer, how quiet it had been until the twins had disturbed her mopping. She sighed, it looked like she had a long night of work to look forward to after this eventful evening.

She stumbled backwards as the twins entered the room, dancing around her and laughing.

"This is too much, I can't believe - "

"That he actually believed that - "

"Haruhi was a - " They burst into laughter again.

"Out, out! Fiendish twins return to your lair!" Tamaki declared, pointing dramatically to the door. Though he seemed more confused than angry over the appearance of the twins. "You are not welcome here! Our precious client is frightened by your obnoxious antics!"

"More frightened by you, my lord!" Hikaru chortled.

"Kettle black!" Kaoru added.

Haruhi continued to wobble crab like backwards not noticing how close she was to the edge of Tamaki's desk, the surface littered with documents. Haruhi tried to stop, but her legs seemed out of her control when -

"Ah!" Haruhi was thrown back as one of the twins bumped into her. Her back slammed into the edge of his desk, the china of his coffee set disturbed at once, the full kettle spilling quite suddenly over the entire surface of his desk. "Ow," Haruhi muttered, rubbing her back. She slowly turned around, noticing with distant horror that Tamaki was gaping aghast and the twins were frozen figures, stuck mid motion. She gulped.

It was ruined. Paper drowned in dark, dark coffee. Words disappearing in a wave of coffee, swallowing up by caffeine and sugar. Haruhi took a deep breath as she surveyed the devastation, rubbing her back.

Everything was ruined beyond repair.

* * *

AN: inspired by merith. Hopefully will go for three parts. Hopefully, those muses can be dreadfully devious.


	2. Chapter 2

**If Not For The Day**

**

* * *

**

**Part Two**

* * *

Tamaki's is gaping in sheer despair, the twins are cowering away, eyes alight but and Haruhi's back hurts. In the midst of her rising horror Haruhi wondered if she was qualified for worker compensation.

"The case file... " Tamaki murmured, "Destroyed! The biggest case, my biggest most important case of my career, ruined beyond all understanding!" Tamaki retreated to a corner, a dark cloud of despair hovering over him, occasional strikes of lightning bringing his face into sharp relief. Haruhi shivered.

This was not going well, Haruhi realised. "The biggest?" She whispered. Then shook herself. "Is there - " she gulped, "There anything I can do?"

"You!" Tamaki rose from his pit - corner really - of melancholy gloom, pointing one finger at Haruhi accusingly. "I slaved over it for weeks and days, the case is worth thousands and thousands! More than you would earn in a year! Ten years!"

Haruhi steeled herself. "How much?" She murmured weakly, seeing her overtime rocketing into the heavens. The twins watched intently, smirking at one another.

"Eight million yen!" Tamaki exclaimed, raising one finger now, high to the ceiling.

"Those estimates were low," Kyouya said, entering Tamaki's office. Everyone else jumped, staring in surprise at his shock entry. "Realistic estimates would put it much," Haruhi quailed, "Much higher."

"Oh... I see," Haruhi muttered, she tugged at the collar of her shirt. "I - I don't have much money," she said.

"I know," Kyouya murmured, walking in the room swiftly, past the twins who leapt out of way. Kyouya leaned back against one of Tamaki's chairs and adjusted his glasses. "It soon became apparent when I did an initial survey of your background."

"I will pay it back," Haruhi insisted, despite the urge to run away at the thought of Kyouya Ohtori having any information about her in his hands.

"Yes you will," Kyouya amiably agreed. Tamaki nodded firmly behind him.

"That's right Mother, we will bring an end to clumsy commoners!" Tamaki murmured, tapping his chin. "Wages will, of course, be substantially reduced."

"You will be on call even on your days off," Kyouya added. "Just in case we need you."

"A commoner! A commoner!" The twins exclaimed together.

"Haruhi returns to a desperate state," Kaoru whispered tragically, wiping away a mock tear.

"It's just like in the feudal times," Hikaru said. "An indentured commoner, servant to their noble masters due to their oafish nature."

"And of course," Kyouya continued, glasses flashing as he pushed them slowly up his nose. "Regarding the case, we will need your special services."

"Indeed," Tamaki said, "A mop, a cloth and lavender deodouriser! My desk is ruined!"

"We will have to add that to the debt," Kyouya said thoughtfully, "As well as your antique pen set." Tamaki nodded self importantly next to him.

Haruhi felt rather faint as Yen signs drifted above her head and forever out of her reach.

"But I was not talking about Haruhi's unremarkable skill with cleaning aids. Rather Haruhi's newly acquired status as a fully qualified lawyer."

"Oh, that?" Haruhi asked distantly.

"Yes, that," Kyouya murmured, "Your scores were quite impressive and your comment reviews only praised your skills." Haruhi nodded in acknowledgment, still hazy. "Tamaki will inform you of the details of the case."

"That's it?" Haruhi said. "That's all?"

Kyouya shrugged, "Hmm, perhaps you underestimate this case. Our client is... difficult, demanding and yet undeniably, extremely wealthy. She expects development and your actions have severely halted that. You have one day until the case brief is due."

"One day?" Haruhi asked, "But - "

"You have one day, don't make me repeat myself. If your actions do not prove satisfactory, then I will have to take further action," Kyouya smiled then. "And we wouldn't want that to happen, now would we?"

She shook her head, "No. Just - "

"Good. Tamaki, inform Haruhi of the case, we have a client to please," Kyouya ordered. Tamaki stood to attention and saluted.

"It will be my great duty and pleasure to - " Tamaki began but halted to a stop when Kyouya exited. "To - to," he glared at Haruhi, "To the case, commoner!"

* * *

"It's not making sense," Haruhi said, flexing her hand as she tried to gain some relief from the constant note making on Tamaki's ramblings. "It's perplexing."

Tamaki sighed, a long gush of air escaping his lungs, it ending in a faint whistling sound. Tamaki shook himself, murmuring, "It does make sense!"

"This is... " Haruhi peered at her notes, "Renge Houshakuji's third marriage? To Umehito Nekozawa? But after three months they are getting a divorce?" 

"Yes, yes and yes!" Tamaki agreed.

"You don't find it... odd, that after only three months they are getting divorced?" Haruhi asked.

He shifted, fiddling with his cuff, "Yes," Tamaki admitted. "I attended their wedding and I thought they were a very happy couple. Renge looked beautiful in pink lace." He pulled a wet picture out of the mess of soggy documents. It showed a beaming couple, well, Renge was beaming, Haruhi couldn't really tell if Nekozawa was under his dark robe. But the robe looked happy enough, she considered.

"Then why are they getting divorced?" Haruhi questioned.

"Because," Tamaki said, drawing out the word. "Because, they are! I don't know why, I just deal with what happens afterward! I don't like people being unhappy and I want this process to go as smooth as possible," Tamaki hunched down in his chair.

"Oh, okay," Haruhi said, awkwardly, after a pause. "We had better get on with the case then."

"No!" Tamaki exclaimed.

"No?" Haruhi muttered irritably, "Didn't you say this case was important?"

"It is! But I was seeing this case from the wrong angle," Tamaki insisted joyfully. "I was thinking about making everything as smooth as possible, to end any unhappiness but that isn't it at all!"

Haruhi shifted in her chair, glancing at her watch. "Really?"

"Of course not! The couple will be only happy when they are together! I saw how happy they were, they can be happy again and we will make them realise that!" Tamaki declared.

"But - the case file. My debt!" Haruhi pointed out.

"I'm sure Kyouya will find what we're doing perfectly acceptable," Tamaki murmured, walking away and not seeing Haruhi's downcast expression.

"Do you think that is possible?" Haruhi asked pessimistically.

Tamaki ignored her, tapping a finger against his chin. "Let's see, let's see. We will pay the lovely Renge a house visit!"

"Then to Nekozawa?" Haruhi said, browbeaten. Tamaki shuddered.

"Er, maybe not," he brightened, "If things go well the happy may reunite on their own without me ever having to see Nekozawa!" Tamaki crowed, clapping his hands together. "We just have to charm Renge."

"I don't think this is going to work," Haruhu muttered, "I think I'll just work on the case - "

* * *

"I look ridiculous," Haruhi said blankly.

"Don't be strange!" Tamaki murmured cheerfully, straightening her tie, "You look quite dashing, I'm sure Renge will be quite pleased with you."

"Aren't we supposed to getting her together with her husband?" Haruhi asked, scratching at her neck. "This is too tight," she added.

He leaned in, tugging at her tie again. "Though your manners are quite uncouth! Imagine not knowing how to properly knot a man's tie. Didn't your father teach you?"

"Actually," Haruhi considered, "It never came up in my home."

"Hmm, silly commoners!" Tamaki exclaimed as he gave one last critical look at her tie. "Renge is," Tamaki tilted his head to the left, "Very," to the right, "Open with her affections."

"Really?" Haruhi said dismally.

"Yes, she proposed to Kyouya when we were at high school," Tamaki smiled, "Kyouya turned her down, of course. The man is an eunuch!"

"Do you - do you know what an eunuch is, Tamaki?" Haruhi asked slowly, dreading the answer.

"Of course, silly!" He tapped on the head, "It's a Chinese servant. Those noble commoners forswore wives and devoted themselves to their masters!"

"Um, yes, that's right, I guess," Haruhi said awkwardly.

Tamaki nodded, "Renge will appreciate our advice if it comes from someone young, lithe and attractive." Tamaki frowned, "And brunet, she has an unfortunate dislike of people with blond hair," he absently played with a tendril of his blond hair."

"So she dislikes you," Haruhi murmured flatly. It made sense, she mused.

"No, no, no!" Tamaki then spun around and ignored the question. "This is why you will be delivering our advice!"

"Me?"

"You! Haruhi!" Tamaki whirled on his feet and pointed a finger at Haruhi.

"No," Haruhi said, tugging at her tie again. "I need to work on the case or I will be in debt forever."

* * *

"I can't believe I'm doing this," Haruhi complained, staring out of the window of the speeding car.

"It is for the greater good," Tamaki said, "We will bring together two disunited lovers! They will rejoice! They will love!"

"What if we fail?" Haruhi asked, rubbing at her neck. Tamaki frowned and flicked her hand away.

"Failure is not in my dictionary!" Tamaki exclaimed.

"You need to get a new one," Haruhi said, "It is likely very outdated. Failure is a common enough word," Haruhi added.

Tamaki's face crumpled and he looked up at her pitifully. Haruhi sighed and put her hand on her lap. Tamaki smiled, "Good!"

The car slowed to a stop outside a iron gate. The driver murmured something into the radio and the gates swung open after an answering crackle on the radio. Haruhi gulped as she watched the imposing house come into view. It was huge, white columns and an impressive staircase that led to an oak door.

"Good luck, Haruhi! You'll be a natural!" With that worthless advice, Tamaki pushed her out of the door. Haruhi stumbled, turning around as Tamaki waved goodbye and drove off. She was left standing there, mouth open. "This is not a good day," Haruhi muttered, straightening her suit.

As she began to ascend the stairs, Haruhi stared at the door, wishing it would open. "They know I'm here, they should be ready. Rich bastards," she finally said, puffing a bit. "Too many stairs, there's no purpose - "

The door swung open. "Oh Ho ho ho ho!" A voice - demon possessed Haruhi assumed - cackled out. "I have a visitor to my abode!"

A woman stood, smiling with one hand on her hip, nodding to herself. "I am Renge," she said, "You are?"

"I'm Haruhi Fujioka," Haruhi answered, "I'm here to save your marriage. I have to."

Renge's face darkened. "Your quest is futile, young Haruhi!" She cried out, a hand delicately resting on her forehead.

"I have to save your marriage," Haruhi repeated, "Otherwise - "

"Otherwise?" Renge descended the stairs, pale pink dress swirling on her heels. "You are in love with me!" She declared. "You poor fool, for I am still a bound woman. Bound to the dark Nekozawa!" Renge cried out, tears forming in her eyes. "Only a brave, valiant man could rescue me now, rescue me from a life of torment and tragedy. You are this man, Haruhi!" Renge embraced Haruhi, hugging Haruhi close to her heaving bosom.

"If that's the case, then I can get the divorce papers ready and - " Haruhi started before she was interrupted.

"Your words do not assure me, sweet Haruhi," Renge insisted, "Nekozawa is a black and cruel man, he lives for my pain!"

"You looked very happy at your wedding," Haruhi pointed out. "But if things have changed - "

"That is true! My wedding day was the happiest day of my life," Renge sighed, staring wistfully off in the distance.

"Okay," Haruhi said simply, "Can we get back to - "

"Afterwards, after the Honeymoon, everything had changed!" Renge sobbed, leaning on Haruhi.

"Right," Haruhi closed her eyes and sighed, defeated. "How so?" She asked methodically.

"He no longer presented me with flowers every evening, no longer wrote gothic poems about out love, no longer did that thing with his tongue every day but only every three days!" Renge whispered tragically. "He no longer loved me the same!"

"But that's normal, Renge," Haruhi said, "Marriage isn't about those gestures, it's about forming a life together, that's why he asked you to marry him. Because he wanted you to spend the rest of his life with him."

Renge gaped, "I - I didn't see it like that," she admitted, toying with the ribbon in her hair.

"He probably thought that those gestures weren't so important," Haruhi shrugged, "Token, romantic gestures," Haruhi said, dismissive.

"Oh! But he did do other things!" Renge cried out happily, "He made me toast, it was burnt, but it still tasted nice. And he said it liked to watch me sleep," she added, spinning around.

Haruhi coughed uncomfortably, "Yes. Well, if that's settled, I had better go and - " Haruhi was crushed.

Crushed by Renge's tight clasp on her. Haruhi made a muffled sound as she tried to escape. "Hmphf!" It was to no avail.

"Thank you, thank you! You made me see light again, you made me love again!" Renge declared, sobbing slightly.

"Oh," Nekozawa muttered who had suddenly arrived quite silently in Tamaki's car, "I had better go then." Next to him, Tamaki started flailing. He leaped out of the car, hands waving in the air hopelessly.

"No! Haruhi is not a ladies man, I'm sure - " Tamaki whispered quickly.

"She is in love with Haruhi," Nekozawa insisted. "I can't - I won't made her unhappy anymore." He retreated deeper into the shadows, stroking the head of his puppet, Beelzenef.

Tamaki stamped his foot and pouted. "This is not a happy ending!"


End file.
